KENTUCKY: New Bishop says he will "listen" to his people
A Satirical Essay
By David W. Virtue
www.virtueonline.org
Sept. 27, 2010
NEWS ITEM: Diocese of Kentucky consecrates new bishop. Bishop Terry Allen White is the new leader of the Diocese of Kentucky. "Rejoice, people of Kentucky - you have called a listener," the Rev. Canon Susan L. Sommer told hundreds of worshippers that included rows of clergy and bishops, a brass ensemble and a large choir.
"He has an enormous capacity to listen carefully to the Holy Spirit both within the community that he leads and as well as within his own heart," said Sommer, the priest-in-charge of Grace and Holy Trinity Cathedral in Kansas City, Mo., who worked with White when he was dean of the cathedral there.
VOL caught up with Bishop White outside Echo Hearing Systems
in North Kansas City, Missouri where the bishop had just purchased a new hearing aid and asked him the following questions.
VOL: Bishop, will you tell us what the extent of your listening will be?
White: I will listen and listen and listen to everybody till my ears ring.
VOL: What will you say, if in the course of your listening, a number of your priests tell you that TEC has violated Lambeth Resolution 1:10, ignored the requests of the Primates over the Dromantine and Dar es Salaam communiqués and blown off The Windsor Report?
White: I will continue to listen.
VOL: What if some of your priests say that the passage of resolutions C056 and D025 at GC2009 has only further isolated TEC from the worldwide Anglican Communion? What will you say to them?
White: I will listen politely. I might also nod, but that could be taken as a sign that I am falling asleep...listening.
VOL: What if they believe TEC is going down the wrong path and actually moving away from the dominant understanding of the faith expressed by the vast majority of Anglicans?
White: I will continue to listen, but I might shake my head to make sure the sweat doesn't cause a ring around my miter.
VOL: What if a couple of priests say that they are losing parishioners over the ordination of gay bishops Gene Robinson and Mary Glasspool? What advice would you offer them?
White: I would have to listen very seriously and very carefully about what it is they are trying to say to me.
VOL: Okay, so you have been doing a lot of listening. Now what if those same two priests came to the conclusion that they could not stay in TEC because of all these sexual and ecclesiastical innovations and wanted to part amicably, what would you say to them?
White: I can't hear you.
END