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EPISCOPALIANS PROPOSE VOTING BY TIK TOK
A Satirical Essay
By David W. Virtue, DD
www.virtueonline.org
August 2, 2020
NEW YORK, NY -- Episcopalians, led by Presiding Bishop Michael Curry, are proposing that all Episcopalians living in 100 dioceses should vote by Tik Tok in the upcoming November election.
The new resolution introduced by Executive Council, held in executive session, would demand, like Resolution B012, that ALL Episcopalians must use Tik Tok and vote Democrat or face expulsion from the Church.
"There is a huge risk that Donald Trump might be reelected if the normal means of voting including in person, by mail or email, as it could result in election fraud," said Curry, the Episcopal Church's first black Presiding Bishop. "We can't have 'beloved community' infected and destroyed by the Orange Man."
"Tik Tok has demonstrated its reliability as we know we can trust the Chinese in almost everything they do and say, the Uighurs notwithstanding. We believe Trump poses a greater threat to the sovereignty and security of the US, not Tik Tok", said Curry.
"We believe it is foolproof, with no blowback from hackers," he said. A FACEBOOK response from the Chinese embassy in Washington agreed and sent a congratulatory note to Curry and the executive council.
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